My Mother raised me.
Dad was there, in the background.
He provided. He presented an example. But he was aloof.
I always thought losing Mom would be hardest.
I was wrong.
I woke in the wee hours to a mechanical sound I knew was trouble. It was VERY cold outside, and our furnace was making strange mechanical noises. Snug in my bed, I could feel the temperature in the house begin to drop.
I heard Dad get out of bed and walk past my bedroom, then out the back door. I knew where he was going. Our garage with all the tools was detached.
Soon I heard the back door open, then the sound of the tool bag being dropped on the floor of the utility room. "Clink, clunk, clank"... the sound of tools being manipulated resounded through the getting-colder night air.
And then the furnace came back on, making normal furnace sounds.
And the room warmed.
And Dad went back to bed, to catch a few more Z's before he had to get up and go to work.
Roof overhead. Food on the table. Comforting warmth.
To provide.
We had a very strained relationship until I was drafted and left home.
We never got as close as I would have liked. He was too Macho for that.
But we did get closer.
And I thank God every day for that.
21 December 2020
Another "Dad" Memory-
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5 comments:
My Dad and I had a mixed relationship. Somewhere around the time he turned 60, it was like he decided to re-invent himself. Our relationship improved tremendously. Sadly, he died from un-diagnosed obstructive sleep apnea five years later. I miss our lost opportunities. I especially regret my sons not having a grandfather as I married an orphan.
Similarly with my dad.
And I'm glad I got to know him as an adult.
Sadly I lost my dad when I was a child. That the relationship improved is good news.
WSF, it was a comment you recently made that motivated me to publish this.
Reflecting on my relationship with Dad, I'm just surprised at how much, even in his MOSTLY absence, his example impacted my behavior in major ways.
He was responsible. He avidly read both the Indianapolis newspapers in front of me when he got home from work. He was a Christian who took care of not only his family, but his neighbors and fellow man.
Mother taught me details.
Dad taught me the BIG PICTURE.
When I think about that, it pains me to realize many of the biggest problems we have in our nation today can be traced to the fact many of these kids don't have that example.
NFO, I'm sorry you lost your Dad. But I wonder... you turned out well; did you have a strong Father figure?
Dads are amazing. Mine was a complex man but he was a perfect father for me. My husband has also been a great dad. I love how they take care of things and we know they will.
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