23 March 2017

(%#!+&$* !

My cell phone just rang.
I don't recognize the number displayed, but decide to answer anyway-
"This is Greybeard".
Female voice- "Hello?"
I don't respond. (I've been here before... all too often lately.)

"Oh! (Giggles.) I'm sorry! I was having trouble with my headset."
At this point I begin to attempt conversation, but the person(?) on the other end of the line just continues rapidly with her sales speil. (Spell check says "speil" is misspelled.)

I hang up, irritated, and once again wish I could just flush the cell phone down the commode.

Too often these days I envy Thoreau.

22 March 2017

The Surprises at 70:

Are skin tags like mushrooms?
Where do these age spots come from?
I still have a full head of hair. What happened to my "hairy" legs?
My hearing is failing.
I can no longer read road signs from half a mile away.
Two, (sometimes three) trips to the bathroom are necessary after going to bed.
When I get up for a bathroom break during the wee hours, I toddle like a Weeble, (but I don't fall down).
It is MUCH easier to determine who makes your life better, and who simply complicates things. (I'd rather have four quarters than 10 dimes.)

In today's political climate I'll paraphrase a quote from my Mother...
"I'm glad I'm 70."

20 March 2017

The Lottery

In the old joke, Abe cries out-
"Lord! Why is it you never let me win the lottery?"
A week transpires and Abe doesn't win, so again he cries out-
"Lord, I'm a good Jew! Why do you not let me win?"
Another week goes by and Abe doesn't get a notification of winnings.
Once again he cries to the Lord-
"Father, I'm a good Jew. I always keep Kosher. If you let me win I promise to do wonderful things with the money!"
At this point Abe hears a tremendous voice from above-
"Abe... go buy a ticket!"

Up 'til recently I've only been interested in the lottery when the possible winnings started making the news... $443 million in one case as I recall.
But this Winter here in Destin the Convenience Store that sells Sunday newspapers and lottery tickets is EXACTLY one mile from us... a perfect round-trip walk for two folks needing an excuse to exercise, (and desperately needing that exercise)!

So, twice a week on our walk, we donate a buck to Florida's education fund and take home a lottery ticket. We buy just ONE ticket.
Our son ridiculed us...
"You realize you have NO chance of winning don't you?"
Of course.
And that's the reason we buy only ONE ticket...
We know that buying two tickets would not double our chances of winning million$.

But, twice a week we take our single ticket in hand and go to Flalottery.com and anxiously check to see if we are big winners. The entertainment value of checking our numbers against the numbers listed there is WELL worth the two bucks a week!

Last week our ticket matched three numbers, good for $5 in cash.
I used that five bucks to buy a ticket for Wednesday night's drawing, and pocketed $4 to buy future (sure winning) tickets.

"Lord, if you let us win we promise to use that money to do great things in your name!" :>)

13 March 2017


I don't feel like writing.
I can't explain it... maybe I'm in "Don Quixote" mode... feeling it's a total waste of time?
I have stuff that "wants to come out", but the motivation just ain't there.

I'm fine though...
Putting miles on the Piaggio MP3.