She'll be angry if she knows I posted this, (so keep it to yerself).
I have a hiatal hernia. Sometimes, particularly when I'm eating fowl or fish, I swallow and that food makes it about halfway to my stomach.
It ain't comfortable. Sometimes the situation requires I excuse myself to the bathroom. (I'll leave it at that.)
Yesterday my beautiful bride brought me a Quesadilla made of turkey, cheddar cheese, and a light squirt of yellow mustard. It tasted great. BUT... About halfway through finishing the thing I had a "stoppage". And the fact I was uncomfortable caused Lewy Body Dementia to take control of my wife.
She got upset that the meal she fixed me caused me discomfort. MY discomfort made me less tolerant of her upset condition. Once again I forgot that at times the person that looks like my bride... is no longer the wife I married. I'm now married to this disease.
My problem is that I have not yet learned how to defuse the situation. And yesterday I failed completely.
Sigh.
Change DOES NOT come easily for me.
But for me to remain sane...
To care for her in the best way possible...
Major change is gonna have to happen.
If prayer comes comfortably to you, pray for me and all who are dealing with dementia and other terrible health issues.
Thank you.
11 March 2023
Anger. 10March23
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7 comments:
The only lesson I have learned is to get up every morning and start putting one foot in front of the other. Does it always work? Hell no! What is the alternative; curl up and die, run away?
Prayers for y'all.
It is the cruelest of diseases. I offer my prayers.
I feel for you.
Just do the best you can with the limited options.
We're fighting the same battles on a different front here.
Have had your problem for years. Had a doc give me Prevacid. Worked wonders and I take it every day.
Hubby had alzheimer's. These types of disease are so insidious and for a time they are themselves and without a sign they become the person with the disease. Hubby was fading faster than I could allow myself to believe. He had taught himself to code and one day sitting in front of his computer not moving I ask if he was ok and when he said I don't know how to turn this on. Worst day of my life. Forgive yourself and know this is anger at the disease not her.
I don't have any wisdom and don't believe in prayer as many do, but I do believe in sending energy as something we can do. And will do what I can of that for you both. You might consider getting information about surgery for that hiatal hernia. I do know those who had such and it was good. A lot for me would depend on how major that was as basically, I can see where you need to be there for her too. Tough situation for you both.
Thank you for caring, Rain.
A close friend had the surgery done for her Hiatal hernia. They gave her the radioactive die to light up where the surgery was needed, and during the surgery her hernia ruptured and gushed the radioactive die all through her abdomen. During her recovery they did not turn her enough and her leg got gangrene and had to be amputated, and she was bedridden the rest of her life.
My condition is so infrequent, I really don't feel any further attention is necessary.
Any surgery requiring General Anesthetic is a BIG DEAL.
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