Roller Coaster

"Your Mom was admitted to the hospital today."
That's not something you want to hear when she is 700 miles away. The only saving grace was that my sister the RN was there to keep the updates coming.
Then Mom got worse.
When I called to talk with her, my 86 year old Mother said she didn't want to live if she continued to feel so bad.
But the next day she felt somewhat better.
The only way to get an objective view was to head to Pensacola.
I drove down Saturday. On the drive came good news:
Mom was much improved and they'd be discharging her sometime Sunday.
I'd be there to take her back to her apartment.

She was tired and weak, but managed to tolerate my humor with smiles and a laugh now and then.
She even shuffled to the dining room for dinner, then shuffled back saying she felt better after eating.
She slept fitfully Sunday evening.

Monday morning her blood sugar count was down and she felt odd.
She ate candy and felt somewhat better.
Her count normalized.
She ate dinner in the dining room and complained it wasn't good, so she didn't eat much of it.
Her count went down again... more candy.

Later on Monday she announced she had made the decision to "move to the third floor".
Mom lives in a beautiful three-story retirement facility. The two bottom floors are for "independent living"... you have to be able to care for yourself to live there.
The third floor is for "assisted living"...
A full-time Nurse resides there, and they watch their residents much more closely, checking on them often and even insuring their medications are doled out on time and in the proper dosage.
And that's Mom's worry...
She's now taking so many pills she can no longer keep 'em straight.
Heck, I CAN'T KEEP 'EM STRAIGHT. 

The fact she made this decision on her own is bittersweet.
I'm glad she was "the decider" and not me or my sister.
I'm glad staff will watch her more closely, because her quality of life will certainly improve if her blood sugar level is more closely monitored and leveled out.
But the idea she needs "assisted living" opens a new chapter in her book of life.

Every day I can talk with her is a gift.
I'm selfish.
I want LOTS more gifts.