"ART" Comes In Many Forms

"C'mere... I wancha to try somethin'!"
My Mother was standing in her kitchen with her hands full of stuff that looked just like the photo above.
She was fashioning a rose out of cake icing.
It was absolutely beautiful.
"This is really easy for me to do and I want you to try it so I know if I just have a natural talent."
I took the tools in my hands and gave it a shot.
The result of my efforts looked like a hot cookie fresh out of the oven.

She was motivated to take a cake decorating class. Actually, the class didn't teach her much.
She baked a wedding cake for a member of our family.
It looked wonderful.
It tasted like a home-baked cake.
She left the reception with orders for three more cakes.
Word of mouth took off. She started baking a wedding cake and several cakes for parties and receptions each week.
Her "Hobby" was making pretty decent money.

My Dad was in charge of deliveries.
After a while the responsibility of producing and delivering something SO important to a once-in-a-lifetime event began to weigh on them both.
So they stopped taking orders, and disappointed LOTS of people.

And every time I go to a wedding and see a beautiful work of art I'm reminded of my Mom the decorator and my Dad the deliverer, and the fact that someone went through a lot of stress to get that cake delivered, intact, tasting like something others would want to put in their mouths.

It's a good memory.

Taxation Without Representation!

Washington D.C. voters say they're being cheated-
They're citizens, but they have no real say in Congress.
They want to be our 51st State so they'll get two U.S. Senators and representation in the House.
I have a better idea.
Move the Nation's Capitol to Kansas City. Give the D.C. Real Estate back to Virginia and Maryland.

This solves at least two problems:
It makes our seat of government less susceptible to enemy attack, and,
It gives D.C. residents new representation in Congress via their new State residences.

And we don't have to worry about designing a new 51-State flag...
Yet.

Frontier.com

Fifty-Nine minutes, 12 seconds.
That's how long I spent on the phone with my Internet Provider.
I woke yesterday and tried to watch some YouTube videos on our Roku System...
No workee.
We got a connection to our router, but no internet connection.
I reset everything that had a "reset" button.
I unplugged the router for 20 seconds, then plugged it back in.
Still no dice.
None of our neighbors have a connection.
Oh well... give 'em a little time to fix the problem.

I tried two hours later...
Same result.

So I called Frontier.com's service number and, as usual, got someone with an accent that made it difficult for me to understand.
"Go unplug your router."

I made three phone calls yesterday and spent maybe an hour on the telephone. I finally got the person on the other end to admit there was a technical problem at their end. She assured me they were working on it and the problem would be resolved soon.

I woke today with hopes she wasn't blowing smoke up my delicate tush.
I now understand why my tush was irritated.
We still have no internet connection.
I can complain if I just email them at "Frontier.com/service". I may do that just as soon as I have an internet connection.

I spent an hour this morning, mostly on hold, waiting on someone to tell me when I'll begin to get the service I am paying for.
Instead I'm informed a new router is being drop-shipped to my address because my router is more than a year old and MAY be my problem.
I'm now at the Public Library writing this.

So, you tell me...
What are the chances the new router will fix what ails us?

My 200,000-Mile Checkup

"Have you registered with the VA?" my friend asked.
"No. Why? Should I?"
"Well, we were exposed to Agent Orange and they're now finding LOTS of health difficulties associated with it popping up in our peers. You need to register with 'em just in case you have problems later."
And so I registered. And they've given me a pretty extensive semi-annual physical ever since.
My latest was yesterday.

Height/weight/blood pressure/heart rate.
Cholesterol levels.
O2 saturation.
Blood work.
Pee in the bottle.
Take a peek at the eyes and ears.
Stethoscope listening to various functions.
And more.

My VA Doctor is a Pakistani female, complete with head scarf and now... wearing TWO face masks.
With her heavy accent and "muff murf stamig?" through the two masks, it's almost impossible for me to understand her questions.
But we muddle through.
She's VERY efficient.

My weight is down a little. My tinnitus is worse. PSA is okay. Cholesterol, Vitamin D, Sodium... all okay.
Neutrophils, auto... Neutrophils, absolute... Eosinophils and several other "Phils"?
Who is this "Phil" guy and why are they watching him so closely?
But apparently  all my "Phils" are fine.
The only Clinker in the closet?
My blood sugar. Thank you Mom. (Or maybe this is MY Agent Orange problem?)

My glucose level and A1C are both off the chart. I know why.
And we've all heard "Denial" is NOT a river in Egypt.
My glucose problem is caused by COUPONS.
Yeah, that's the ticket!

Burger King. Culver's. Little Caesars. McDonald's. Taco Bell. Wendy's. And tens of other fast food joints...
All send out coupons to tempt me.
And "Cheapo Me" takes complete advantage of 'em.
That's a LOT of carbs. And I think "Phil" is an expert at turning carbs into blood sugar.
I think Phil also loves the BIG nightly glass of Merlot.

But my relationship with Phil has to change.
My Pakistani overseer is now pointing a bony finger at me, promising me insulin shots if I don't get this glucose situation under control.
Her finger is a scary thing... reminds me of Halloween.

Retirement was supposed to be easy, relaxing, and enjoyable.
This is beginning to look a lot like WORK.
Where did I take that wrong turn?

George Floyd

Don't we already know the outcome of this trial?
If Chauvin is found guilty, many will be outraged. But the only bad thing that will happen will be he will go to prison.
If he's found not guilty, cities will burn, and people will die.
Black lives matter.

Yesterday I learned something I had not heard anywhere in the "News"...
Before he was even on the ground, Floyd said, "I can't breathe".
So he was an ill man, already suffering from respiratory trouble before Chauvin laid hands on him.
He also had a bad ticker, and was under the influence of several drugs.
None of that matters.
Black lives matter.

Do you see any way short of Civil War to get our country back to sanity?

"It's not fair..."

Sara Jean says, "It's not fair. Women get old, wrinkly and ugly. Men get older, more rugged, and handsome."
But that's only true with some-
We watched "Executive Suite" with Barbara Stanwyck this morning.
A WONDERFUL, talented actress, she got prettier as she aged. In "The Big Valley" I thought she was beautiful.
And Errol Flynn certainly did not die a "rugged, handsome" man.

Genetics play a huge hand.
But environment and attitude also play a major role, don't they?

Dolly Parton - He's Alive (The 23rd Annual CMA Awards)

My annual Easter post-
Dolly still gives me chills.

 

                  

Shot

Covid vaccinations-
The rebel in me pretty much said "Let 'em shove it up their ass."
But my wife is a "Nervous Nellie" and worried about things like needing to get on an airliner if the vax is required.
So I acquiesced. We scheduled and got our shot yesterday. Part of the reason I agreed was because the vax was the Johnson and Johnson single-shot vaccination.
So... done.

And now it seems there are questions about the J&J vaccine that will impact some 15 million people.
Our "experts" have struck once again.

What a load of feces.

Mice Eat Mice?

Six weeks in the Florida Panhandle... wonderful. But that part of Florida can be cold, windy, and wet simultaneously during Winter, so... BUG OUT TIME.
Fourteen weeks in Phoenix... great. If you spend time there you can easily understand why old farts like me spend Winters there. In the 3+ months we were there it rained three days. Temps this year never dropped below freezing. Normal days we experienced 65 degree highs; 45 degree lows, with humidity generally running 20% or so.
Nearly perfect weather, but we Midwesterners began to yearn for a raucous thunderstorm about the beginning of March!

We rented a Toyota Corolla for the trip home and decided to take an extra day in hopes we'd not be so exhausted when we reached our destination. I also decided to take different route home.
In the past we have driven South via Tucson/Deming, NM, El Paso/ Dallas-FTW/ Little Rock/and home.
We've also traveled via Holbrook, AZ/Albuquerque/Amarillo/Ok City/Tulsa/Springfield/and home.
Both those drives are long and, for the most part, boring. This time I decided we'd head North out of ALB and drive up the East face of the Rockies, hoping they'd be snow-capped and beautiful.
We were not disappointed.

The Corolla was comfortable. It drove nicely, got about 35mpg at 75mph, and had "smart" adaptive cruise control, (which henceforth will be a requirement for any future rental choice!)
We did NOT order a GPS option, and that turned out to be a mistake when I depended on memory as we headed North out of Colorado Springs...
Thank God I realized I was lost early on; stopped at a Fire Station, and a fellow Public Service worker got me back on the proper path home!

Motels we stayed in:
A "Comfort Inn", a "Super 8", and a "La Quinta". Since all we require in our temporary housing is a clean place to sleep and bathe, (and breakfast of some sort is also nice), we generally go the "budget" route for accommodations. All our stays were satisfactory, but I was surprised our normal choice, the La Quinta, had NO breakfast offerings at all.

The trip was uneventful. After gratefully spending the night in our own home and bed we returned the rental car and came home to resume our normal routine.
Scooter and truck started without fuss. But while I was sitting in my pickup allowing the battery to get it's first charge in months I caught a glimpse of movement to my right and saw either Mickey or Minnie sitting transfixed on the passenger seat. After a few seconds, MM decided to beat a hasty retreat into the bowels of my Ram/Cummins pickup somewhere. It was after a little searching that I noticed the roll of toilet paper we leave in the truck for emergencies had been well-used for nesting material.

Last night I set the trap... on the passenger-side floorboard, with peanut butter as bait. Investigation this morning found the trap gone!  I searched beneath the passenger seat... beneath the driver's seat...
Nuttin'. But further investigation beneath the extended-cab jump seat revealed the trap with a half-eaten mouse lodged against the rear bulkhead of the truck.

So the question now is-
Did Mickey get a bellyful of Minnie...
Or Vice-versa?

Road Trip Random Thoughts

-Topeka Kansas is the home of Harry W. Colmery. Who knew?
-Kansas is windy. Fifty knot gusts made me thankful I wasn't driving an 18 wheeler.
-Anyone that thinks Kansas is flat has never been to Ft. Riley.
-Renting a car without GPS is a big mistake.
-But having a "seek" function on the FM radio proved there are LOTS of  "classic rock" stations out there.
-Four cylinder engines are buzzy and irritating in mountains but get GREAT mileage.
-Buzzy rental cars help you realize how much you love your non-buzzy car.
-Windmill farms are majestic and simultaneously an eyesore.
-In fifty mph winds, windmills feather. (Shut down.)
-Cell phone coverage on Interstates is nothing short of amazing.
-There is NO comfortable way to drive more than 700 miles in one day.

Care to add to my list?

Driving Miss Sara

We're two days into our trip home from Phoenix. We spent the first night of our drive in Albuquerque. Experienced a HORRIBLE traffic jam on Interstate 40 near Gallup, NM, nearly dead-stopped for almost two hours. This is the seccond time we've had terrible traffic there and WILL NOT be coming home that way again. 

Decided to take a different route home from ALB this time and headed North on I-25 toward Denver- up the Eastern face of the Rockies. The peaks were snow-capped and GORGEOUS. 

Spent the night in Limon, CO in a tacky little motel room. Since we only spend a few hours in the motel we've always felt so long as they are clean and have basic "necessities" like a TV and microwave, why pay a fortune for those few hours? 

There's just no way to make a 24-hour drive comfortable. But flying, more and more, is becoming such a burden I no longer want to do it. Our rental car, a Toyota Corolla, is a pleasure to drive.
It's getting 35 mpg at 75mph and has something I will NEVER again be without-
"Adaptive" (Smart) Cruise Control. It takes much of the stress out of driving long distances on the slab.

Home tomorrow night, our neighbors inform us our wild onion crop is ready for harvest.
That's a smell/experience I always enjoy in the Spring.

I'm homesick.
And ready for Spring storms and home "Honey-do's".

"It's Snowing!"

We set out from Phoenix yesterday with a GREAT plan-
Leave comfortably around Noon +-. Drive North to Hwy 74, then go Westbound to Wickenburg. Just Northwest of there, hang a turn onto Northbound 89. Make our way through Yarnell where the "Hotshots" lost their lives in the fire some years ago, then continue to Prescott. Just East of there take 89A through Jerome and Cottonwood, then on through Sedona to just South of Flagstaff and spend the night at the Air Force recreational facility at "Ft. Tuthill" County Park.
Beautiful.

All went exactly as planned. Weather was "Clear Blue and 22", and we drove through Sedona as Ol' Sol was getting low in the sky, casting intense red rays on the already red stone cliffs there.
Breathtaking.

The "Best Laid" plan was to spend the night at Ft. Tuthill, rise at a comfortable hour and have breakfast, then drive a couple hours North to "Horseshoe Bend" near the AZ/CO State line. Time permitting, I wanted to also hit the South Rim of the Canyon to take in the view there. At that point I intended to take the pulse of both Sara Jean and Big Bubba to see if they wanted to pound the pavement back to PHX, or get a room for the night in Flagstaff and head back to Phoenix rested on Wednesday.

The Air Force facility at Ft. Tuthill was a BIG disappointment. The problem MAY have been partly due to the WuFlu virus. The place was... umm... Spartan, to put it kindly. We slept fitfully.

Morning dawns. Sara Jean opened the draperies to the room.
"It's snowing!" she says.
And indeed it was. Four inches of the stuff on the ground.
Not just flurries... big, wet flakes coming down, limiting visibility to about a mile.
The chances of seeing anything at Horseshoe Bend or the Grand Canyon?
Zip.

So we leisurely lolled in bed until checkout time, then drove and had Brunch at Denny's, after which we all agreed to point the car South to Phoenix where our phones said it was 65 degrees with a chance of rain.

Sara Jean's first view of the Grand Canyon will have to wait for another day.

How Much Longer Can We Afford this?

Got a "safety recall" letter last month on the Yamaha Super Tenere... the front brake switch might be faulty, and lots of things could possibly happen if it acts up- brake light not illuminating, cruise control suddenly disengaging... other bad stuff. That bike is now 7 years old with almost 30,000 miles on it, but the repair including parts and labor was free.

When the bike was finished the service manager came to me with forms that needed a signature and showed me a few things that he felt needed attention. Front fork seals are leaking. A cover over the ignition parts is also leaking. And the right saddlebag that needs replacing? A steal at $500 !
My question- "How much to fix the fork seals?"
The hardware- $75.
Three hours labor?- $495.

No thank you. I'm sorry, but that sure seems usury to me.
And I'd feel not QUITE so bad if I knew the mechanic was receiving the vast majority of that charge.
But he/she/they will not.

We'll probably ride the thing until the wheels fall off.

Fastest Way To Lose A Pound!

The entire Greybeard family gave blood yesterday.
It was Big Bubba's first time to donate.
Sara Jean has donated a few times. I've lost count of my donations.
There are many good reasons to donate. Most of 'em you already know. In addition to the instant 1lb. weight loss, I've read that donating will make you live longer and look better...
Something about lengthening telomeres? You can look it up.

Anywho, we increased the supply of A+ blood in the system by three pints yesterday.
Consider donating. It'll make ya feel better and maybe regain some of that "youthful glow"!

"If You Could See Me Now..."

You'd be lookin' at a guy who just passed his Amateur Radio "General" license examination.
Whew!
I WAS NOT sure of the result when I turned my test in for grading.
This one had my head swimming. When they grade it they only tell you if you passed or failed, so I may have passed by the skin of my teeth.

No matter. The ticket will arrive in a couple days, and I can now RELAX.
For a while.

Ham

And I don't mean with Navy beans and cornbread!
I'm talkin' about Amateur Radio.

In the early 60's I was dating a gal whose Dad was involved in Citizen's Band radio. When I'd pick her up I'd hear him chatting with others in his radio shack and go visit with him until she was ready to go.
Eventually I realized I was more interested in him and his hobby than I was with her. I learned a lot about radio from him and eventually bought my own "rig", and got my Dad interested in CB in the process.

In those days you had to apply to the FCC for a CB license in order to be able to transmit on the band.
I sent in my application with the nominal required fee and got my license. I became "KNK6124".
(The license to operate on the Citizen's Band no longer is required, going away about the time the C.W. McCall record "Convoy" hit the airwaves. That was also about the time CB became profane and for me, impossible.)

Dad and I were both interested in Ham radio at that time because that realm offered a lot more options than CB...
More available bands and frequencies, and the potential for "around the globe communications".
But there was a problem... at that time you needed to pass a test showing proficiency in Morse Code in order to get an Amateur Radio license. Neither of us had the time or inclination to learn Morse Code.
My interest in CB waned when I was drafted.
Sixty years pass.

I have become a mild "Prepper".
And one of the "nice to have" things, even if it means just communicating/coordinating with neighbors is a little "Handheld radio" and Ham Radio license.
And SMILE with me... the requirement to know Morse Code no longer applies.

Last month I scheduled my exam with the local Ham Radio Club here in Phoenix. I took the "Technician" exam and easily passed it.
I immediately rescheduled for the "General" license and will sit for that exam tomorrow (Saturday) at 1000 hours.
I've had my nose in the study guide now for a week. This exam is NOT so easy as the Technician exam, and I'm a little worried about my possibility of success.
Keep your fingers crossed for me, or if you're of a mid to- say a simple prayer for me.

I'll keep ya posted.

"Chunky"

He may as well have hit me upside the head with a 2X4.
Referring to one of his co-workers, my buddy's Father said, "He's 'chunky' like you."
Chunky?
At the age of 12, I hadn't given much thought to what others thought about my appearance.
But there it was. I was "chunky".

I inherited my difficulties with weight from my Mother.
At 5' 2", I have a photo of her when she weighed 190 pounds. She fought obesity her entire life.
I have too, although thankfully not to the same degree.

In retirement it's easy to develop bad habits.
Sitting in the recliner, remote in hand, I was beginning to enjoy the rut I had dug myself into.
It was when I could no longer button the waist of my Levis that I realized I had do dig myself out.

Running?
I hate it. I've ALWAYS hated it.
And my compound fracture in Santorini gave me pause about pounding on my right ankle anyway.
But walking is comfortable for me.
Sara Jean is also noticing "changes", so we agreed that walking was our exercise of choice.
We try to walk a minimum of 3 miles daily.
We walk at a 3mph pace, so our three mile walk takes us...
Duh... an hour. But when the weather is perfect and we have smiles on our faces listening to "Oldies" on our little radio, we'll continue our walk, sometimes up to 5-1/2 miles- shown on our "Map my walk" app on our phone.
The results have been slow in coming. But we put the pounds on gradually, so taking them off slowly is best, isn't it?

When I could no longer fasten my jeans I weighed in at 228 pounds.
I'm now down to 201, and struggling to get below 200. (As you lose weight the body becomes more efficient because it's not doing as much work as it was. Pounds begin to be VERY difficult to lose.)

My stomach is flat.
I'm sleeping better and I no longer snore.

Long ago my friend's Dad did me a favor. He made me take a close look at myself, and I've been aware of my weight and appearance since.

I'm happy to say I don't think I'm "Chunky" today.
"Hunky"?
I'm workin' on it. ;>)

Manhole

At 0300 hours, strange thoughts can occupy that wide-awake time.
Two mornings ago the thoughts were of things I have done that few have experienced.
Descending into a "Manhole" is one that I can check off my list.

In the few months after High School, before getting drafted, I worked for Indiana Bell Telephone company as a "cable splicer".  The job required me to splice multi-colored wires correctly to insure Lily Tomlin's phone would work when she wanted to "ringy-dingy".
That meant I had to don "gaffes" and safety harness to climb utility poles.
And since some of the telephone cable ran underground, it meant descending into a hole in the street.

We had to park the truck, flashers on, to protect the workplace from traffic. Then we had to strategically place dayglo orange cones so that no one would run into the truck.

Manhole covers, by necessity, are heavy. 100 pounds? At least.
If you look at one closely you'll see there is a notch on the outer edge. That's where you'd insert your special tool to pull the cover off the hole. It wasn't easy.

Frequently the hole would be full of water. We carried a pump for that purpose. Pump the water out so you could do the work, but some holes would have a steady stream of water flowing into them so you had to either leave the pump running, or intermittently climb out and start the pump to remove the water as needed.
Noisy.

Toxic, heavier than air gases were a possibility. We had a device that could measure the environment in the hole to detect them. If necessary, we had fans with flexible ducting to drop into the hole to ventilate the work area.
More noise.

So into this noisy, ill lit, damp area you'd descend with tools to do the job.
Workers all over the world are doing it as you read this.
Thank God for them.
I'm glad I don't have to do it anymore.

Do you have a "Bet you haven't done this" story to share?
I'd love to hear them.

Let's Play "WHAT IF?"

 Okay Bunky, let's play a little game of "WHAT IF?"

What if you're involved in a poker game and you continue losing, in spite of having some of the best hands of cards you've ever had in your life? You suspect something is wrong, but you cannot prove it.
So you keep your mouth shut and leave the game.

A short while later, one of the other players in the game tells you, "I saw the cheating. One of the players had an Ace up his sleeve." In addition to his comments, you find out there was a video of the game which proves his accusation is correct.
What do you do?

Some would go and confront the cheaters.
Some might even threaten a violent act.
Some, who had lost enough in the game to be desperate, might even commit violence.

Now my "What If?:
There's another game scheduled shortly, and the same players will be in attendance.
IF you cheated last time, what will you do this game?
And IF you had your head bashed in because you cheated, what is your likelihood you'll risk harm to life and limb in this game?

I think democrats, rightfully, are scared to death of Trump and his supporters.
We are not likely to forget what has happened.
And we sure as HELL are not gonna allow democrats to cheat us again.

Are we?

Supersize Me?

Pizza Hut. Wendy's. Taco Bell. Jack In The Box. Del Taco. McDonald's. Burger King. Little Caesar's. Denny's.
All within easy walking distance of our Winter home here in Gilbert, AZ.

Coupons. Promos... All the above issue them.

I'm a "feed your body good fuel" kind of guy.
But Satan is in the details.
It is too damn easy to "Yo quiero Taco Bell" cheaply with a coupon and save the leftovers for tomorrow.
And dishes?
Wad 'em up and throw them away.